3:27 am, just took another handful of medicine, tastes like shit, but hey, i t is what it is. I have a gym in my house, a full gym, and I am just staring at it. As I write this, which by the way took me forever to get around to doing, I am listening to Andrea Boccelli, amazing Italian opera singer… vampire music I guess.
I remember when I first heard of ICP, I was coming home from something and I had a ROCK MAGAZINE, and there was an article and interview with the world’s most hated band ,I thought, who the fuck are these guys?? I only read the article because they had mentioned that my friend from the SEX PISTOLS, Steve Jones, had played guitar on their record.
That was 15 years ago, and it seems like yesterday, and when you’re kinda crazy like me… maybe it was? Most of you all know the story, about how I and ICP became legendary in the worlds of professional wrestling.
Now, I must say ICP had already done their thing in WWF, ECW, and all that long before they met me, and that is a mega accomplishment in itself. Me? I kinda had been floating around the world getting fired from all the major promotions cause I just refused to sell out, give in, or back down. For any reason, from anybody. In a world where everything and everyone is totally connected politically, and well, they all just suck as people, as well as professionals, I guess that was not the best thing to do. Kinda like getting shut down by all the record companies cause you care more about the fans, because you stand by what’s right… kinda like ICP.
Not sure what to say next… as there is so much History between myself and ICP… so I asked all involved if I could write a letter directly to the JUGGALOS, I explained it was something that I had to do, I don’t feel right about some things, so…here it goes:
I grew up in the 1970’s explosion of street culture and first wave of alternative music, when everything was alternative… dress and music, and social movements… it was all one back then. I remember being in Toronto and I was outside a punk club, and I was talking with GRAND MASTER FLASH about how important his music was to us punks back then, amazing… just crazy. There was no race or religion, it was just “motherfucker this is goin on now, and is changing the world”, and it did.
I have been involved in so much shit over the years, but I think one of my favorite rock n roll moments was when I was in a pawn shop looking at guitars that I could never afford… but looking at them was enough. In walked BO DIDDLY, with a camera and he pawned it, and left.
I was just fucking stunned, I ran home and told my Mom, and I remember I was crying. Bo Diddly, was ,in the eyes of all who know anything about music, the real man who started ROCK N ROLL…not Elvis, not Carl Perkins… not the devil… Bo Diddly.
He was a Black Man, who had been playing his chunky style of ham bone guitar on Chicago street corners since he was 8 years old, and just… talking , improvising over his one rhyme… playing the same song over and over, just changing the words to make money so he could eat.
Now imagine, being a Black Child, on the streets of Chicago, in the late 1940’s, and just doing your thing musically, with no training, just the beat, the desire to fucking do it!!!!
Bo, was the real deal, bad ass motherfucker…He was invited to play live on the Ed Sullivan show, which, was also live, and responsible for all we now know as rock n roll: the Beatles, Rolling Stones, James Brown… all started on Ed Sullivan… but … what was the ultra mega ninja move, was that Bo was told to play a song written by a white man and he had to play along to a recording.
He said sure! Well, Mr. Diddly went out there, turned his shit up to 10 and did his own song BO DIDDLY and totally fucked up America and broke down the wall of racism, and started what we now call ROCK N ROLL! Holly Shit! You can see it on youtube by the way… right here.
I consider myself blessed that I was able to shake his hand that day, cause he really was the first, the one and the only…
Part of his struggle is what motivates me to continue on… which is why I am hoping you finish reading this.
I remember when I started in WCW, I was the rebel, I was the guy everyone copied, I was the one who said fuck you, I was the one who fought the bully and I was the one who wanted to take down the machine.
I HATED life, I HATED EVERY SINGLE THING to do with WCW, I HATED corporate America, most of all I hated all the piece of shit people that I had to see every day, the fucking phony plastic wannabe piece of shit rat bastard people in the wrestling business, I HATED them all… It made me sick to have to be close to these people to work with them.
I was in so much trouble, cause I was new in WCW, and they treated me like a j-brone, and were rude to me because I came from Mexico , ( fucking racist inbred steroid filled fucking piece of shit hypocritical bastards) I am from Canada, and, Fuck! I still hate them. I was in trouble cause 1) I hit them to hard… wait?? Is this fuck me up the ass cause I am a big steroid bitch on tv ? Or is it pro wrestling??? And 2) the punk rocker in me just needed to remain an underdog!
I was begging to get fired when I showed up to Monday Nitro, and I saw a Mob of dudes, all kinda fucked up looking sitting by themselves, away from everyone, and I kinda had a strange feeling… not like a boner ,but kinda like… there are some freaks like me here for a change!
I was called into the production office, and thought that after I made my debut on Nitro a few weeks earlier and had that little accident of kicking my opponents fucking teeth out, they were going to fire me.
All I remember was them saying to me… Hey, we are gonna try something with you tonight. You are teaming with ICP, go and say hello to them, they are the fucked up guys like you sitting by themselves away from everything.
Now I got the boner!
As I walked over to say hello, I felt like what the fuck is going on? We said hello, hugged, It was like… that night, the new Bo Diddly was gonna go on tv and make a statement for a generation of kids… which turned out to be us, throwing it up and putting it down for the Juggalo Army.
The first exchange was like this:
Rude Boy says hello, Alex says, don’t let anyone hurt my boys, Shaggy felt my ass and Violent J says… so… Vamp, who’s the dealer?
Rock n roll, all over again… Crazy, right?
So here we are, right now and I am trying to figure out how to say thank you to ICP, The Juggalos, everyone on Psychopathic.
Well, first I need to say I am sorry for a lot of things. My attitude and work rate has been horrible, and I feel like I let everyone down. It’s not ok, and I just can’t stop thinking about it. Two years ago, and this is totally true… fucked up, but true. I went to the doctor to see what’s the deal and he told me I have 3 crushed vertebrae in my neck that will never heal, 7 broken vertebrae in my back, that make it difficult to walk and it hurts all god damn day (hence the mega doses of Vicodin). I said Doc, what the fuck!!! Half joking I said, well, with the 6 broken noses, two torn rotator cuffs, 5 knee operations, broken fingers, broken eye sockets, concussions, chipped elbows and a birth defect (small penis) that’s no big deal! He said no… you also have a brain tumor and cancer in your stomach, and a punctured lung. Nice!
I was shot down in flames, upset, alone, scared and did not know what to do… Thinking about it as I write this… I can see how I should stop things and get better, and this is my apology to all JUGGALOS, and ICP… I am so sorry for my horrible work rate my last few times out. Last year at the Gathering… I was not even 40%, I was just really suffering and spent the whole Gathering in my bunk, throwing up blood and in pain, not saying shit to anyone… just scared, I only went to The Gathering so I would be around friends… family.
So, here we are again… I am still sick, I am fighting everyday to get better, and, I do not know what the future holds for me… But I was born to fight ,never give up, don’t look back… and that is why I am going to The Gathering this year. Not the music, not the wrestling, but to be close to you, and say thank you.
Thank you Psychopathic, Thank you Juggalos, thank you ICP, thank you all… With that said, Of course I have more to say, but I feel better if you know what’s up, I am sure half of you are like… what the fuck is he talking about or, who gives a shit?? I don’t know, I am just thankful for the chance to say… I am not done, forgive me for not being 100%, I love you all, and I will be around for awhile.
Ummmmm, oh yeah!
OFFICER COLT ANUS, our match in JCW .Thank you for giving me the match. You are definitely one of the top players in the game now, and have been for awhile! Maybe 10 years ago I would have gave a shit, but honestly, no disrespect, but I don’t give a fuck about who you are. I understand what you do, your friends, your here and there, but look it up on you tube, all your j-brone friends you mark out for, and chase around, all the top guys in the business today… all of them, at one time, did the job to your friendly neighborhood Juggalo man, Vampiro! Yup they sure did. And when I stood on national TV as JUGGALO CHAMPION, telling everyone that the JUGGALO ARMY had arrived and was here to stay, you were at home, doing your homework, hoping to someday be one of us. Well, time has gone on and yes, you have made it, and you have done so much and come so far. It’s fucking great to see that bro, it really is. I wish you nothing but the best. But as far as JCW, and your match with me… Well,I can tell you this right now… I’m not gonna be able to give you the match you want, I won’t be able to give you what you deserve: Vampiro at 100%. I won’t be able to even come close to being my best. All the therapy I am doing, it’s really fucking with my health…
So Officer Colt Nutsack, I gotta say sorry right now… BUT, not because of what I can’t give you in the match… Sorry that after all this time, I have had in the business, 28 years, the only thing I can guarantee you is that I am gonna come to FIGHT, and beat your ass in front of my people, and no matter how hard you try, you can’t beat me, cause like everyone else who has ever been in the ring with me: Cm punk, Sheamus, Raven, anyone.. They never fully understood that Vampiro is not one person. Vampiro is every Juggalo worldwide wrapped into one…
So, COLT ASSFACE, whatcha gonna do, when JUGGALOMAINIA and Vampiro run wild on you?????
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Vampiro will be wrestling Officer Colt Cabana at Bloodymania 6 during The 2012 Gathering of the Juggalos.